I did wonder what today would bring – I’m still surprised and disheartened, but at the same time I’m not at all.
I read a quote earlier from, ” We Don’t Always Know How to Manage Our Pain” on Healthiest, “Just because we have been dealing with it for ages doesn’t mean we always know how to tame it. “I’d change ‘pain’ to ‘condition’ or what ever you want to call it.
I was explaining earlier to Katherine that even though I’ve been living with MS for nearly 8 years, and Crohn’s Disease for what must be 20ish years; I still get it wrong when it comes managing the condition; the pain, the fatigue, knowing my limits, etc… I knew yesterday would be hard work but you still have to make the most of the energy you have on the good days.
So off to the park we went, and a lovely time we all had too. I think everyone let of some steam after a difficult week. We then headed to Grandma & Stephen’s for Jake and Poppy to ride Cherry the pony. Katherine and I walked the dogs too. I definitely used a fair amount of energy and I think it showed, as Katherine told me to go and site down, and Stephen ushered me inside for a cuppa and a chat. He’s been a great support; I’m sure he won’t mind me saying but his late wife had MS so he knows what’s going on.
After a quiet evening, I had a really restless night and as soon as I opened my eyes I knew I’d overdone it – today the mute button has been pressed again; I’m speechless once more. I’m feeling a little confused, off-balance, numb, in pain and really bloody tired.
Here’s the funny thing, I know full well this won’t be the last time I feel like this the day after and I’ll do it again at some point, it’s a bit like “I’m never drinking again” when we wake up with a hangover. I’m not going to let MS stop me, and nor should you. We can still enjoy life, everyone gets tired; we just have a little more to balance, and make the most of the good days!
I’ve just been chatting to a friend of mine – she asked how I was so I told her and she replied, “But you enjoyed yourself, Nick” and that’s the thing I did and you know what I wouldn’t have changed it for the world!
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